Real Transformation Begins When You Step Away from Your Current Identity

When we declare to ourselves the identity we want to create and step into, the life we want to create, the woman we want to become — something inevitable happens.

We will be given challenges to face, as some people call them, or opportunities for growth, as I prefer to name them. These situations are experiences that we can’t avoid if we really want to go on this journey of transformation.

Our subconscious mind chooses the path of least resistance in order to conserve energy and keep us safe, and therefore it would love for us to become someone new without having to deal with hard things, with blocks and shadows. Puff — we wake up one morning as a new woman. How cool would that be?! The subconscious mind thinks and hopes. Of course, there’s nothing surprising about this: when we consider that the one and only job of our subconscious mind is precisely to keep us safe in what feels familiar, this desire and this resistance to anything new make sense.

But that’s not how transformation works.

We can’t expect change to occur if we keep

living,

being,

behaving,

thinking,

acting,

choosing,

moving

in the way we have always done.

In other words, there can’t be transformation if we are not willing to go through the shadows, the blocks, the kind of resistance that we feel in our entire being when we’re taking a step in a new and more aligned direction.

So, going back to where I started: when we are given opportunities for growth, we can actually take two possible and contrasting choices:

Play safe by being who we’ve always been, that is, the woman we’re actually trying to say goodbye to. (That’s the path your subconscious chooses and successfully or unsuccessfully convinces you to follow).

Or handle these situations differently — in the way the new identity - we desire to create and embody - would. This is the path that causes resistance, since it goes against what you subconsciously — and therefore naturally, habitually — would do. This is the path you have to choose if you want transformation and growth to occur.

And I want to be honest: choosing the second path is not easy. Precisely because of what I’ve explained so far.

At the beginning, your subconscious will not naturally support the new direction. It will not motivate you to choose differently. It will sneak in excuses and invitations to go back to what feels familiar so that you postpone or even abandon your new idea and intention. It will basically cause Resistance (with capital R).

How do you solve this protective mechanism ? You have to intentionally choose your responses and actions. It’s a conscious choice that you have to repeat over and over and over again until the subconscious understands that the new thoughts, actions, beliefs are safe to honour, embrace, and live by.

How do you actually do this ?

Become aware of moments where you can choose your response.Take a pause instead of reacting automatically. Breathe. Ask yourself 3 questions:

1. How would I have responded if I hadn’t paused ? (The answer shows how your current identity would have acted).

2. How would the new woman I want to become respond?

3. Which of the 2 reactions do I choose to honour and have ?

If you choose your new identity’s reaction, there’s another important step you’re gonna have to put in place: nervous system regulation. Calming your body, reassuring it that responding in this new way is safe represents a fundamental part of your transformative journey . (There are various techniques that help regulate your nervous system. One day I may write a newsletter about this. In the meantime, I invite you to check them out online).

To summarize, the journey of becoming someone new is not smooth or free of Resistance and of challenging moments. But when you are able to handle situations in the way your new self would, when you go through that Resistance, you grow stronger and more empowered. Step by step you move forward, creating and simultaneously embodying the new woman you desire to become.

That is how transformation happens.

I’m ending this letter informing you that I am currently offering 90-minute hypnotherapy sessions at a student rate of $66 (the price will increase throughout time as I advance in my training). By applying the coupon code DISCOUNT25 you receive 25% off your first session.

During our 90 minutes together you will:

– learn a simple yet powerful technique that you can practice at home, called self-hypnosis

– learn what hypnosis is and isn’t

– be given a real hypnotherapy session where you’ll experience calm, clarity, and the possibility to shift limiting beliefs — always at your own pace, and always in full control

If you would like to reserve your spot you can directly do so by booking here and if you have any questions, feel free to reach out through my website.

Thanks for reading this letter.

Take care dear woman,

Martina